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Emotional Maturity, and the challenges from the lack of it

How often have we heard of stories or know of people in our lives who refuse to grow up emotionally?

The thing is there are few immediate clear signs of someone who is emotionally immature until you know them on a deeper level, and the signs become more obvious.

Of course, the immediate clear signs would be those who easily have emotional outbursts, or they lose their temper easily. Sometimes, people think that these are people with strong personalities when in truth they are just emotionally...

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How To Lose In Order To Win

Have you ever heard of this concept of losing in order to win?

This idea of losing in order to win doesn't seem to make sense right? Well, this idea only works if you are able to be bigger than your ego. So what does that entail?

When our ego or lower ego, as I like to call it, is bigger than our true self, than it is hard to allow ourselves to lose. Because the lower ego thinks in terms of winning and losing, and the lower ego keeps scores.

If we are bigger than the lower ego, what this...

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The Reality Of Loneliness

I posted something on my FB page recently on loneliness, and it has received a relatively high number of responses. 

This is the quote by Carl Jung:

Loneliness does not come from having no people around, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible. 

This is true and I do have to agree up to a certain extent. Let me explain. 

We all go through different levels of growth and maturity,...

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Compassion Is Not Some Motherly Care & Love

In my last blog article, I talked about Compassion as a superpower, so what exactly do I mean?

For most people, when we mention Compassion, they immediately think of the archetypal energies of religious figures such as Mother Mary or Kuan Yin, and usually, compassion is associated with female and mother figures. This can be a problem if as a male, you find that you have not gotten in touch with your own yin energies and so you might tend to see compassion as a form of weakness. Or if you're a...

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Why Must We Suffer - Shamala Tan, Spiritual Coach/Healer

The very first thing we must get right within our own mindsets when we are suffering is that it is not personal. I know, this sounds oxymoronic, because the experience of suffering is really so personal!

We feel so attacked by life, by people, by circumstances and everything around us. 

Why do I say not to take it personally? We suffer to acknowledge several things -- to acknowledge our humane-ness with the rest of the human race, and to develop the ultimate superpower of...

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You may be committing adultery without realising it - when our boundaries are not clear (part 2)

Uncategorized Feb 01, 2021

 As promised last week, in this sharing, we are going to talk about physical, emotional, mental and spiritual boundaries. 

Let me just break them down in parts so that you can see and relate with some general examples I share. 

Physical boundaries:

Ah, we see this so clearly these days with social distancing. It is so much easier to practice this, for some people, especially when they have not been able to understand or practice physical boundaries with others.

Physical...

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When our boundaries are not clear (part 1)

Uncategorized Jan 25, 2021

Do you struggle with establishing boundaries with others? If you do, then you might find yourself in situations you don't want to be in, even though it wasn't so at the beginning. 

The struggles usually become real, because of our inability to say No, and we feel bad saying No, whether this is to strangers, our friends, colleagues or even family members. 

Most people feel bad saying No to their family and friends because there is a sense of obligation. Now, if you don't know where...

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Do you use your spiritual label as a cloak for your emotional inadequacies and immaturity

A few people have asked me if I'm no longer offering spiritual services and if I am just doing Emotional Healing work. I AM STILL offering spiritual services, click on this link for services.

The thing is, spiritual growth and development can only happen with Emotional Healing & Mastery, hence, my focus since the beginning of December has been on emotional therapy and coaching. And lots more people, now more than ever need healing and support for the emotional side of things.

...

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Until a person heals themselves, they will be toxic to everyone who tries to love them.

Only hurt people hurt people, as the saying goes. People who say hurtful things to you whether intentionally or unintentionally come from a place of pain. BUT, it is also important that we check inwards to see if we have projected our pain onto them.

When I work with my clients, one of the first things we do is to turn inward to empower self i.e. the client. People may have said or done hurtful things to them, but ultimately it is the healing process that is the focus.  So likewise, in...

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We Don't Know What We Don't Know

There was a Twitter exchange between Stephen King and a tweeter, which goes something like:

Stephen King: No, Coronavirus is NOT like THE STAND. It's not anywhere near as serious. It's eminently survivable. Keep calm and take all reasonable precautions.

Someone replied: Have you read the book?!

(Those who have heard of The Stand would probably know it was written by Stephen King).

As with all social media platforms, sometimes you get the good stuff, but it is also a place where you can...

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