The Lower Ego And It’s Operation Of Judgmentalness & How Does Observation Work

Let us continue this week with the topic of the lower ego, because it is an interesting one, and also because it runs our lives in always all aspects of our lives, even the spiritual aspect. We see it rampant in religious organisations, may I add. (But that’s a topic for another week!)

Today, I like to talk about Judgmentalness & Observation. This is a very interesting topic because very often there is so much confusion about what they mean and the difference between the two. Keep in mind that the lower ego enjoys having us all confused. Because confusion means we are not getting right, and this means it is easier for us to fall into the lower ego trap!

Ok, so what is an observation and what is a judgment.

Let’s paint an imagery observation scenario #1:

Eric has noticed that most of his colleagues who are parents spend most of their weekends sending their children off to study camps, recreational centres and they are very busy ferrying their children everywhere. While their children are in class, some of his colleagues find themselves comfortable spots in cafes to catch up on reading, or watching Netflix on their devices. Some of them spend their time shopping and stocking up on groceries for the week.

Now, let’s paint an imagery judgmental scenario #2:

Eric thinks that most of his colleagues who are parents are sending their children off to study camps and recreational centres on the weekends because they want time for themselves. They would park themselves in cafes catching up on reading or watching Netflix on their devices. Some of them use the opportunity to shop or buy groceries. Eric feels that this is not good parenting.

So let’s look at the above two scenarios. #1 is plainly describing the situation without any emotional input or a personal perspective of what is going on. We are left to form our own judgments.

For #2, personal opinions and feelings have come into the description of what is happening. And Eric’s personal experiences have shaped how he sees the situation and have formed judgments towards his colleagues even though he is not in their shoes.

Let me give you another example:

#1 Jessie has been running her business for some years now. Due to a mistake and miscalculation on her part, her business went into deficit while trying to expand and is now in great debt. She has made plans to get her business back into the green.

#2 Jessie’s long-time business is in trouble. She must be greedy, trying to expand too quickly and now the business is in trouble and is in the red. She has all kinds of schemes to raise funds to get her business back on track, but they sound like scams.

See the difference between the two? Can you tell which is an observation and which is a judgment?

The scenarios I have painted seem extreme, but this is to facilitate the process of understanding for you. Far too often we form judgements about people and situations with our own perspectives and opinions without walking in their shoes and this is what the lower ego wants us to do.

It wants us to go around in circles and in toxicity in our connections with others. It wants us to form a toxic layer of a divide between us and others. When we feel this way towards others, there is no way we can feel love, connection and generosity towards others.

This is especially true too if we have grown up in an environment where we attack to defend ourselves. And so we see the world from judgmental lenses as a self-preservation effort. But in truth, there is no need for us to be on the defence with this layer of toxicity towards others. If we learn to open our hearts and learn to observe instead of judging, we will see that others are always trying. No matter how it looks, we are all individuals trying to be and do our best.

I am not saying that we have to be naive and take everything that anyone does or say at face value. But it is important to observe and we make our own decisions in the direction we wish to take in our interactions with them. We may choose to have a close interaction without the toxic vibes, or we may choose not to interact at all and again, without the toxic vibes. We are only able to achieve this without the toxic vibes only when we are clear on where we stand and we understand that we are on different paths, without judgment.

I hope that these examples have given you some food for thought. Let me know what you think 🙂

© 2019 Shamala Tan

Shamala Tan is an author, spiritual entrepreneur and healer.  Her work focuses on transforming the lives of others on the spiritual, emotional, mental and earthly level.

One of her success stories as an author is to being featured alongside New York’s bestsellers Sonia Choquette, Robert Allen, Arielle Ford, Marci Shimoff as well as Christine Kloser in the book Pebbles In The Pond.

Shamala’s clients include small business owners, holistic practitioners as well as those seeking to find more significant meaning and value in life. Shamala offers laser coaching to her clients on a one-to-one basis or in a group environment, offline as well as online.